Lovey Lamb turns 6 weeks!

Meet the most perfect and beautiful little girl you have ever laid eyes on....

How in the world was I blessed and entrusted with such a gift. She is an absolute pearl.

I am in love.

Fox- we did it! We passed the 6 week mark. The time that everyone calls the hardest, the "dark days". We survived. Sure, there were definitely some dark days and hard moments but wow, are you a joy. You smile, you coo, you sleep well (on your best night 7 hours straight and on your worst night 3 hours), you are social, you behave so well when mom does things during the day, you look like both your parents, and you could do nothing and still be the greatest thing to ever happen to us. But that is the miracle of a child. You learn so much about God's unconditional love when you have your very own. She could do nothing amazing and I would still be over the moon for you.

I love you sweet Roxie Renee.

ONE month

Foxy Roxie, the Fox, RoxStar, lamb, punkin bear....

In your first month of life...

You were jaundice and spent 3 days on a big blue light

Colic

Found out to be allergic to dairy

A victim of acid reflux

Made your first trip to the ER

You....

Weigh 9.3 pounds and are

21.5 inches long

You...

Are a complete sass...which I am not surprised. You pull on mommy's hair or necklaces or whatever you can.

You hold your hands in fists when you eat or you like to hold tight to mommy's finger.

You are a total woo girl and every time I wake you up you throw your hands above your head.

You make a blue steel look when you poop which cracks your daddy and I up.

You are SUCH a good sleeper and happy baby but some nights...You have just had it and cry and fuss ALOT.

You are getting more blond and your eyes more blue. On the first day of your life you looked just like me but as the days go on you look more like your daddy.

You have given your dad and me both our own special genuine smile that has made me cry and melted your dad's heart.

You have changed my world love and I am just CRAZY about you! Every night I pray you grow to love the Lord and I pray for the husband that is out there too. I pray that you treasure the person God made you and that you see your dad and I cherish each other.

For me, I survived month one of being a parent. It is such a refining process and I understand the love of our Father like I never have. I LOVE this little one like I never knew possible but also struggle at this different life I now live. My job is Roxanne and oh boy, it sure is full time. R-E-S-P-E-C-T to all moms and moms who have more than one. JUST. SAYIN.

She is developing more of a personality and I look forward to seeing more smiles. She is starting to recognize me and oh my- that makes it pretty darn worth it.

Here is too many many more months of your life fox and watching you grow into your own beautiful person!

Love,

momma

An Officer, a three week old and a train wreck

That is what makes up our family. I am the train wreck if you didn't pick up on that, and don't get me wrong, I am the most joyful train wreck you have ever seen...but definitely a train wreck.

In the weeks following giving birth, new moms have little to no sleep, emotions like a roller coaster and total loss of time to care about one's hygiene or looks....if you catch me on the right day I can cry on cue about the idea of crying. Not to get out of a ticket or to get something I want...just because I can cry or should I say weep all the time. I think its the fact that while pregnant I was getting 9 hours of sleep and now I get anywhere from 3-6 on a good night. Some days this is plenty but others its rough and everyone can tell. I hear this goes on pretty strong for the first 6 weeks...some husbands call it the "dark days" which is quite hilarious to me.

My sweet Roxie is 3 weeks old today...half way through the "dark days". In her first 3 weeks of life she was jaundice, lost a little too much weight, became colic and then we discovered acid reflux. All these things you would think would equal the worst baby on the planet, but she is still the best little lamb on the planet. She smiles (even though my nurse-to-be sister swears they don't smile this early), she coos, she sleeps, she can put her self to sleep and she sleeps with this beautiful look on her face that melts her momma's heart. However, because of these issues, we have had some HARD days and I mean hard. I wouldn't trade her for anything in the world but on certain days where she cried for hours to high to count I am thankful for the Lord who relieves me of the pressure to do it all on my own.

My biggest encouragement is this: I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me....Phil 4:13

This might seem cliche to you...but that is the honest truth. I have never appreciated a verse more. My quiet times look different than they used to and these days the simpler verses have gotten me through. They are the one's I can repeat over and over in the late hours of the night, or driving around Addison, praying Rox falls asleep. I want to turn to people and doctors to give me the instant fix, but the Lord is teaching me to turn to him and then and only then will I have every thing I need to be the best mom for Roxanne.

So what does that mean? I might be a train wreck for the next few weeks. I will look at my fashion blogs and fitness blogs that I adore, but be ok that I am just not quite there. I will be, that is the beauty of it, but for now I am hoping to brush my teeth in the morning and night, shower an appropriate amount, wear my hair in something besides a pony tail at least once a week, and get laundry done. Meanwhile I celebrate this morning, the fact that I get to care for Roxie all day long. I don't have to gear up for heading back to full time work anytime soon. Its just me and her and for that, I will look like a train wreck. for this little beauty...